Dad, seriously. I'm a big girl now. I bet you want me to grow up and have a good future ahead. But, why are you controlling me as if i'm still a small kid? I need my own privacy and freedom too. You just won't understand if i were to tell you what's in my mind right now. My fucking CA1 is starting next week, sec 3 life is important to me. If you're going to continue with this kind of attitude, i simply can't concentrate on my studies. I swear this will be the last if i failed to pass my favourite subject. I'm gonna give up studying and prove you that i'll be at home 24/7. Doesn't it sound perfectly nice to you? You want me to be at home for like, EVERYDAY what. So be it. I'm gonna look for my own money, and lead my own life. Doesn't mean just by controlling me, i'll lead a good life ahead. It may affect my studies cause it's fucking unfair for me since i'm a grown up girl now. Be proud of me, dad. Just for once, listen to me. Believe every shits about me. I've never let you down before. My studies are good, what else do you want from me? Stop having high expectations on me. It won't bring me any further. It's just ruining my fucking life. I can't be listening to you all the time just to prove you that i love you. It doesn't mean anything at all. We need two hands to clap. You're expecting me to listen to every single thing that you said, but you don't even seem to care about my feelings. I feel like i'm not your child. You're treating me as if i'm your fucking dog. I'm your child, Roselee. Not your DOG. Sorry if this post is really hurting you. I can't let it out to you face to face, you're gonna get mad at me. No matter what happens, I'm gonna prove you that i can still lead a better life ahead eventhough i don't listen to any of your advises. I just can't, you're over reacting. I thought you would change forever. But i was wrong, you changed just for awhile. How can this be? My life couldn't be living if you keep controlling me everyday. You're my father, not someone that i should mostly respect, such as Allah. Your home, is my home too. And it's not a jail. I want to feel the environment outside too. You can't be expecting me to stay at home, staring at the wall the whole day doing nothing. Sometimes i just feel like giving up. But i can't. You're my father, and i have to respect your decisions. But, you're seriously unfair! I bet you're gonna read this post. I hope you understand what's the matter with me for not talking to you lately.
